Mindset Shifts for Fat Loss and Strength Training After 35

Welcome back to The BODY. Recomposition, revolution. This is Robin and today we are talking about the four mindset. Shifts that I feel. Are imperative for any woman or any person. To see success. In their health journey, when I send out initial client consultation forms, whether I'm doing somebody's macros or they're applying for a coaching position, I noticed that they oftentimes will cite maybe their hormones or their metabolism or. Their age or their job? Or their families as being the. Barrier or.

All of them as being the barriers. To why? They keep starting over why they can't seem to be successful. And not often do women come to the realization that the real barrier, the real mountain, is you. Which is also a really great book, you should check it. Out and it is it's, it's incredibly true. And that realization comes with time, and it comes with experience, and it kind of unfolds. Before you whether you. Try to see it or not but. The real barrier? Is not all of your circumstances. The real barrier is.

You. It's your mindset and. There are 4 facets of your. Mindset that's holding you back that I have found over many years of working in the fitness industry, even being a teacher. These are really applicable, but your barriers are. Balance, confidence, being at peace with discipline and. Gratitude, those are the barriers that. Hold you back. And today we're going to dive into them. The first one we are talking about is balance and balance can look really different from person to person. For me, a lot of times I am somebody who once I get an idea in my head that I am confident, I want to.

Pursue I go. For it, I am like a dog with a bone. I'm not going to drop it. I'm going to do this thing or achieve it. I'm I'm going to. Do it better. Than anybody's ever seen in my brain. That's really how I think. Because that is just. My way and I often whatever it. Is like I could. Name a million instances. Balance is really hard for me to find. When I find something I'm passionate about, for example this business, when when I had all my, you know, friends start asking me. How do I do this? So how should I eat I?

Started my business and I haven't stopped since. I am so passionate helping women understand their. Cycle of self. Destruction and how we can be stronger. Better, faster, more resilient. Age backwards. I love. Doing that there is. It is. I am so passionate about it and with my kids, you know, I am, I am very much in the know of what's going on to the point of it being too much. I've learned over the years and plus being a teacher for for many years, I am self aware enough to know when I need to, kind of.

Take a back seat. So balance is oftentimes hard for me and. For a lot of. The women I coach. They feel like they're. Failing if they have one of those moments we are all familiar with and I have them still now where? You. Are standing in front of the fridge and you start eating just a little bite of something you know you shouldn't be eating and maybe 5 minutes later it's completely gone and you're standing there feeling incredibly defeated and you know exactly how much you just ate. So you throw the plant out the window, you go in the pantry and you start, you know, diving into everything, opening every bag.

Why not who? Cares. Screw it, you already. Messed it up, that mindset that all or nothing mentality. That will fail you. Every single time it fails me every single time. And that mindset of. We don't need to be perfect you. Just need to be consistent. You need to have small repeatable actions. That you are. Taking every single day and that. Beats the. Extreme every time. So here's here's an example for me in terms of. Calories of how I always fail. When it comes to. Balance. Even though I coach women not to do what I'm about to tell you.

I do. So there was this competition and it's supposed to end in a few weeks from now. Well, I was kind of gauging out the competition and I saw I'm going to have to go into. A really steep cut. In order to in my mind. Beat everybody. So I. Started, you know, I cut my calories down and I bumped my protein way up and I messed with my carbs in fat. Where I saw. These numbers, these macro numbers, and I knew they were unsustainable. I knew that I was doing what I told all my clients to not do, which was essentially kind of starve.

Yourself. Until you get to where you need to be and then you can just. Reverse. Why do I do that? Because it never works, you know, Because then I have the moment of oh, I do want a bite of this birthday. Cake. And when I have the bite then I feel like I failed and or I don't have the bite and I go. Super. Extreme for those three weeks. And at the end of it, yeah, I feel good. I achieve my goal, but now I'm going to blow up because it's not sustainable. And that that mindset is 1 of maturity. I would say.

And it's something that I have to continuously relearn the hard way, and so do all my clients when you're at that fridge and you start binging. After you have. Your little binge if it happens. Just stop. Just stop. And do not view. It as a failure. It was just. A little bump in the road. You didn't fall off the wagon. You just drop some of your crap. Keep going. You know where you need to go. You know the. Path to get there. You might have been derailed for a moment, but you can't let it stop you.

And again, it's something I battle all the time. And this is where when women say, oh, I've tried everything I've. Tried every diet. Doesn't work for me. Well, no, you didn't. Because all diets work. You just didn't continue with it and you failed and you gave up. And that's fine because diets aren't sustainable, right? We, we know this. That's why macros to me are so freeing, because macros create. Structure. Not restriction when you're doing those. Keto Whatever. South Beach. Remember South Beach?

That is all about. Restricting you? Are you are? Taking out the things you love, you can't have them. You can't have your Oreos. You can't have. Your birthday cake. With macros you can have your Oreos you can have your. Birthday cake. Just log it. Because it counts off your carbs and your fats, your total. Calories for the day, but it takes away. That feeling of I can't have this because when you know that you can't have something, it consumes you. It is that much more appealing, like you need it.

And that's why macros are freedom. Have your Oreos but. Just have one or two, you know, have your birthday. Cake, but maybe just have half a piece. So again, that all or nothing mindset that doesn't work. That's not what macros. Are that? All or nothing mindset, that is. That is diet. Language and it's not. What we do? Now, when it comes to that moment, we were just talking about where you're standing in for the fridge and you. Feel like wow, I really really. Want a? Piece of this cheesecake. I'm going to give you a tip, and these are actually research proven.

They really are. Here's a tip. You can call it a hack whatever you want. If you. Want to have some Oreos per SE? Do not grab the entire package. You're just. Going to take out. Three. Or figure out how many will fit into your macros for the day. Maybe it's 3. Maybe. It's four take out. That amount of Oreos and put it into a really small container. OK, then put the. Package away out of sight you have the four. Oreos in your very small container, whatever it is. For me, I use these little ramekins that I like to put my little treats in my nuts, my, my cookies, my whatever.

Because it's a small white container that has your snack in it, you don't feel like you couldn't have the snack there. It is in your bowl. That is a psychological. Trick where when you have it in a little bowl, you sit down, you finish it, they're gone, you're not going to have that same desire to. Keep. Binging, you're not going to have that same desire. You don't have to have to have more. I mean, and maybe. You will but. Psychologically, when the bowl is empty, you. Feel satisfied. It's just a little mind hack.

Here's another one too if. You eat. Off of a smaller plate if you put your food onto. A huge plate. You're going to eat all of the food. Or if you don't put a lot of food onto that huge plate, you're going to be left feeling like, Oh my gosh, I'm still hungry. This is a true. Tried and true tactic. Use a smaller plate. I actually went to the. Store just last week. And bought a ton of smaller white. Plates so that I could just use. Those for meal time. You wouldn't believe how obscenely large my plates.

Were I was like. This is too much. So I got. These little these little ones and it's. Great, because your plate. Looks nice and Hardy and full. Because it's. Smaller and you feel. Satisfied after you. Consume the entire plate. Just a little hack. For you and lastly, with balance, I cannot express how much a plan matters in terms of you feeling balanced because when you plan your meals, you're taking away all of that decision fatigue, you're taking away the erratic emotions that happen when you have.

Food at your reach. And you don't have a plan because when you don't have a plan, there's my mantra, plan to fail. So. Plan your day, plan your meals, put it in your app ahead of time. Write write it down. What? When are you doing your workouts? Put those in your calendar ahead of time because it is doing what you can sustain consistently that will bring you. Progress that will. Bring you balance, and if you have a real plan for what you're going to eat, when you're going to eat it, when your workouts are going to happen, that plan will.

Carry you through. On your hardest days and not just your best ones. And that alleviates that eliminates that feeling of, Oh my gosh, that all or nothing mindset because you have a plan you don't need. To worry you are you are carried through. By your plan and you're not leaving a moment. To fall apart because you have it all figured out. The second mindset that women, men, everyone need to embrace when they are embarking on these. Health. Journeys. That all sounds so corny is confidence, and you're probably rolling your eyes.

As I say that. But confidence. And when I say that, I don't mean in how you look, I mean confidence in who. You are. And the new identity you are embracing confidence to stand behind the choices that you now have to make. Publicly. Privately because you're. Going to have to do them in front of people and behind the scenes. And with that you're going to experience a lot of internal and external pressure to stay the same. You're going to have that pressure from yourself and you're going to. Have that pressure.

From society, your friends, your coworkers, your family, they want a lot of times they want you to stay the same. They They might love you and they might want what's best for you, but they want what's comfortable for them. And when it comes to your. Peers. Your coworkers. If they're not good friends, you're right, they they want. To drag you to Happy Ever happy hour every week. Because they want you. To stay there with. Them and you have to have the confidence and the assertiveness to know that you made a choice.

You have a goal. And you cannot make all the same choices. You always have or you're. Going to stay the same and I promise you. People will give you crap, people will say. Oh, she's ordering chicken. And yeah, I am. Then you don't need to be argumentative. I will often answer with, you know, true enthusiasm for the food I'm about to consume. Yes, Oh my. Gosh, I love. This chicken and they have the best steamed vegetables, all drenched in garlic and butter. You know, I enthusiastically and again, authentically will respond like, oh, you should.

Try it. It's actually. Amazing, and in most cases. They really should try it. But that confidence in standing firmly in the choices that you know now have to make, that is a huge hindrance for people because you have friends who want you to be drinking beer with them on the weekends. You yourself might think, well, what am I going to do if I can't drink? Because we know alcohol has a ton of carbs in it, right? And it's just. I could name 1,000,000 reasons why it's a toxin for your body and how it affects your metabolism and your fat burning.

We won't get into that. But if you really are on a journey of health, you're going to have to cut most alcohol out and for people who drink a lot, that is very anxiety inducing. Because that's that's a. Comfort for them, that's a crutch for many in social situations, it's, it's lubricant that it makes things easier. You can detach because you're kind of not there, and when you really think about that, that's a problem in and of. Itself, but. You have to make the choice. Do you want to stay the same or do you want to carry forward in a new, better, stronger, more present, healthy person?

The person that you know is in there, but now you've come to terms with all the new choices you have to make and you have to make them with your chest. So when somebody says, oh, you're not coming, she doesn't go out. Nope, I'm not, I'll be in bed. But have fun, You know, say it with a smile because after it, after people give you so much crap, you just learn how to say it with a smile. And another facet I wanted to touch on in terms of confidence is when you're entering the gym. So when you're entering the gym and maybe you're in a body that you don't feel confident in in this moment right now and when you think about going to the gym.

You feel like. Everybody is looking at you. You kind of you're looking at the ground, you're probably holding your phone. You think everybody in their mom is staring at you. You have no confidence, but confidence is not in How? You look, it's just. Standing behind the choices you're making, even when they are uncomfortable. Right, because you're. Building a new identity and confidence is deciding this is who I am now and acting like it. Before you. Actually are that person. You are believing that you are that person.

It's that phrase. Fake it till you make it. And I've one of my clients when I was telling her like you, you know, just enter the space with confidence. Enter the space. Have your eyes upward. Enter that space with pride and the knowledge. That you are here for you. And nobody else. And she was like, that's easy for you to say, OK. Well, it to to her. Point it what it is easy for me to say and I don't I I don't know if I was Born This Way, but I am I am a confident person and I've been a confident person at.

Various at all sizes. Of my life, you know, there was a time when I was 70 lbs heavier than I am now yes, I was pregnant, but there was a lot of in between space in there where I was, you know, not nearly looking nothing like I do now and. You're right, like. I will enter any space with confidence because why would I not? I enter any room I'm going into with my eyes up and I am here to meet. You where you are, because why would you? Enter any room with anything but have pride in the body you're in now, no matter.

What it looks like. When I was 70 lbs heavier, I I loved my body then too. You would never hear me speak negatively about myself. Why would I? Why? Would I that my body when it. Was a lot bigger, housed 3 kids. It breastfed all three. Of them for. Maybe five years. Combined, I know. It was. It is. A snuggly place for them, you know, I I knew. That I could. Change what I needed to change when I was ready to change it. But when I was in that phase of life, yes, I had confidence in who I am and what I stand for.

And now in a different body, I have that same confidence no matter what room I'm entering. This is funny. I think that men notice confidence a lot. Because I have heard. Many times in my life, not just this year, it many times in my life. Wow, you walk so confidently or you present yourself so confidently. Yes, I do. That is a strength of mine, but something about that is evident to men. I feel like they are more. Susceptible to a. Confident presence, probably because they pride themselves on being confident and women need to take note.

Because. When you enter a space, no matter what body you're in, you know who you are and you have so many unique things that make you you. And I know that sounds incredibly corny, but it's it's. True. It is so true I I think. About all my clients and they are all different shapes and sizes. But there is. So many traits and qualities about each of them that are unique and I just love each and every one of them. They have added to my life in so many different ways that I can't even describe because they're unique.

So here's a little. Exercise. I noticed somebody commented on me doing this a long time ago and I've always remembered it. When you introduce yourself from now on to anybody, you don't say my name is Robin. You say? I'm Robin take that ownership when I shake somebody's hand and you know we I am always presenting myself as I'm Robin nice to meet you Don't say my name is it's just a small. Little switch that is. I don't know, throwing a penny in your confidence bank, We just want to keep adding to that.

And this little switch, while it seems insignificant, it really is significant because. You are you. You. Own that when you walk into the gym. You own that when you meet somebody, as I said in the beginning. Hit with your chest. You are insert name the third mindset shift. I love this one. Is there is peace with? Discipline and women, I have found, are there's no other way to. Describe it besides addicted. To chaos myself. Included because I grew up in a very chaotic household. Many women are They don't hate the discipline, but they are more comfortable in the chaos it it's almost.

Like. The drama of falling off and starting over is more of a a comfortable. Space for. Many than just steady consistency. It's almost like the discipline that you need. To a lot. Of women internally it feels boring but that boring is where results live and in this time and space where we all live in chaos is rampant think. About all of the. Obligations you have as a woman, but also if you're a mom, you know, you wake up in the morning, you have to get the kids. Ready. You have to do ABCD? Oh, what about?

EF Oh, and then there's G and now we can't got an H over here. There are so many moving pieces that. That chaos, that over. Stimulated chaotic state is honestly where we spend the majority. Of our lives. So when it comes to planning out your day and thinking, well, I have to my workout here and I'll be eating at these times, that seems like a foreign concept. Because you live. In chaos, the chaos. Is predictable. You are. So over stimulated at all times that that. Like I said. Has become your norm and it's wreaking havoc on your nervous system.

Honestly, it's shooting your. Cortisol through the roof. You need the peace that comes with discipline when I think. Of the chaos. That was my childhood. Love you, mom. It was. It was simply not because my mom and dad were unloving or absent. It was just a lack of of. Consistent routine. There was a lack of. Of predictability and in my my education as a teacher, children need predictability. They need a consistent schedule as an adult, you need that as well. So I'm going to paint a. Picture of. A day in the.

Life of. Somebody. Somebody with kids who has no routine, right? So you wake up. Maybe you hit snooze on your alarm a few times. Now you're running late, you haven't started the day with any movement, so you're feeling. Sluggish. Oh crap, you have to go. Grab the kids, you know, Wake up you. Guys, wake up. Where are your school clothes? Where are your clean clothes? I don't know where are mine. Where is this? Where is that? Did you do your homework? Why didn't you do your homework? Everybody's yelling, somebody's crying now.

There's names being shouted. You're all running downstairs. What do we eat? Who knows? We have nothing prepped. We have nothing made. OK, let's grab these. Crappy snacks that are just going to, you know, shoot. Your blood sugar. Up and make you act like an insane person at school. Who cares, at least you got some food. Whatever, get in the car. Everybody's upset with everybody else. Your hands are shaking. You start chugging caffeine. Because you're still groggy your. Cortisol. Cortisol is now through the roof.

You've had no protein to blunt that cortisol spike that you had when you woke up and all this. Chaos the. Caffeine on the empty stomach that is wreaking havoc on your body. OK, you're also sending your. Kids off to school. In complete disarray. Not OK. OK, so now you're on this, you know this macro kick. Or a diet or what have you. But you didn't prep any food, So what are you going to do? For breakfast, I. Don't know. OK, run to the gas station, grab a protein bar. Great choice. That is a great.

Choice. If you you know, on a pinch like that, what are you going to do for lunch? Who knows? Well, everybody's going to. Chick-fil-A go to Chick-fil-A. We'll just grab it. Do you? You're now you're in a place where your cortisol spiked. You're really hungry. Because of that cortisol. Spike. It messes with your hunger hormones, your gorrel and your left and all of that is in. Disarray, so screw it. Grab the fries, it'll make you feel good. Now we're going to get home. And now that you've already fallen off your mental wagon, might as well just grab some other pick up food on the way home.

Grab Pizza Hut. Now we can all just maintain this cycle. Of chaos without. Even knowing that it. Is a cycle of. Chaos and when is your when you going to have your workout you couldn't have. Your workout you. Were going to do your workout. When you got off work, but you had to go to the grocery store to grab. Food so that maybe you can prep your food tomorrow and then you also had to pick up the dry clean you didn't plan for that oh and then so and so has piano at 5:00 so never mind the dry clean you're going to have to do that tomorrow after work so now you can't work out for two days maybe you can get up early but you know you're so.

Crashed. Out from having the cycle over and over. Speaking of, there's one of my children that you're not going to get up. You're not going to get up, right? You know, I know you're not going to get up. You're going to press snooze because it's a cycle. You live in the cycle of expected chaos. And I, I am not coming from a place of holier than thou because. I have had stages. In my life as a mom, when I had kids and before I had kids. Where it was chaotic because we all have those phases. And to me you can either.

Embrace the chaos. Or you can choose discipline and the peace that comes with discipline. So I'm going to paint another picture. For you. Too quickly. So now we have embraced my children, we have embraced the discipline. We have a plan. You are now getting up two hours earlier. You're not ruling out of bed at 7, you're getting up. Out of bed at 5:00 you've committed to. That so when your alarm goes off, you're not going to press snooze because it's that important to you to have routine to. Have peace with that.

Routine. You get up, you get all the breakfast. Ready you make sure the kids. Its clothes are out. And then you actually have time to go down in your basement and get a workout and you have a. Full. 60 minutes to do that now head back. Upstairs, you're dressed. You're ready and you're happy. You are. You are. Pleasant to be around, there's not. Chaos associated with your. Morning So now you're greeting your family, you're greeting your Co workers, you're greeting whoever you interact with in a state of.

Peace. You're pleasant, it's nice, you have your lunch prepped and ready to go. You don't have to waste money going out to eat because. You already did that. And it's yummy. And it's home cooked. And you feel like good after you eat. It and not bogged down. Your kids had a great day at school because they were. Fed a balanced breakfast. They were greeted. By a nice happy mom. Even your dog is. Pleased because he got a walk. And because. You had your breakfast. You had your lunch pre made. You know what you're having for dinner because you threw it in the.

Crock pot before. You went to work, everything is planned. Out it is peaceful. The kids are sitting there doing their homework. Nobody's running around the house trying to find everything because. You have it figured. Out and there is so much peace in that. And you stayed on your nutrition because again, it was planned out. And I know that the all of that sounds incredibly overwhelming if your life is chaos right now. And again, I'm not coming from a holier than thou place my life. Has had periods of chaos.

It will probably. Slip back into chaos against who knows, but I'm not saying this from a place of me not having been there myself many times. So. If you're wondering where to start, start with your morning routine. Start with your morning routine. And I actually have a whole episode on how to build your morning routine. So you can look back in my episodes and just type in morning routine. It's pretty short, Shorter than this one where I'm rambling, but yes, the third one. Peace was peace. Comes with discipline and finally gratitude #4 you don't need a new body.

You. Just need a new lens and a new way of looking at the body. You have. Again, my dog, you guys. This is what happens when I don't operate within. Schedule everybody else is. On my tail, you just need a new lens because if you have a mindset of lack and want instead of a mindset of ownership, you know, we talked about that confidence when you enter the room. No matter. Where you are physically. You enter the room with confidence. Embrace that sense of ownership. Embrace it, because whenever I'm feeling some kind of way, I always try to think of something.

How would my. Life be without. This person or what would my. Life be like without. My car What would my? Life be like without access to this. Really nice gym or. How would my life? Be if we didn't have you know this. Job or what have you. Go down the list and just if you're wondering where to start, just to think about what the first things you touch when you get up in the morning, you have so much to be grateful. For. And when you look. At your body and your. Life and your surroundings with an attitude of just wow.

I am very grateful. It there is research that backs this to. It changes your entire lens. It changes. Your perspective so show up with gratitude. Lastly, I really. Wanted to share this Instagram. Reel that I saw. And I'm not sure what it was from, I think it might have been from. Diary of a CEO. But. It was just like, whoa, because all of these. Things coincide with an identity that you need to. Embrace as being. The new you and you need to know that that is. Who you are? And on this real, this man, I don't know what his name is, will call Bob.

He was saying think about if. You lived your. Life as an incredibly fit in shape person, that is who? You are. You wake up every day. You go to the gym, you do all the things. You are fit, you eat healthy. That is who you. Are. Now imagine if you woke up randomly one day and you were morbidly. Obese. What would you do? Well, you would know. Exactly what to do? And there would be no slowing you down from doing all the things that you knew you needed. To do to get back to who you are because if you view yourself as a healthy.

Fit person and you know everything you need to. Do it's just a race? Between you and yourself to do all the things you need to do. To get back to who you are, or to get to who you are. For the first time ever but I. Thought wow, that is just. So eye opening and yes, because tomorrow, you know if I woke up 200 lbs heavier I would. Know exactly what to. Do and you would not be able to stop me from doing all the things I need to do. To get back to. Who I am, which is someone who just. Lives tries to live.

The healthiest version of myself I'm a work in. Progress. So are you? Ladies, thank you so much for tuning in today. Remember your mindset. Your identity? Your. Confidence and your willingness. To stay. Consistent and again just. Be grateful. Be grateful because. When all of those things change, everything else follows. Talk to you soon.

Mindset Shifts for Fat Loss and Strength Training After 35

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